Watch Me

Mar. 8th, 2014 07:56 pm
nannyn: (Default)
[personal profile] nannyn
Walk down the hallway straight, idiot. Follow the tile lines if you have to.

Swing your hips a little more. No, not that much. You look like a beanstalk when you do that.

Great. The boys are staring at you now. You look like an idiot. Well done.

Holy crap, these shoes are loud. You sound like a stupid horse, clip-clopping on this tile. And this skirt you’re wearing is short enough to make people's jaws drop. Why did you wear this, again? You are exceptionally stupid.

“To make an impression." What a stupid reason. What an idiot.

Not a good impression to make, on the first day of school. Not good at all. Idiot.

Chin up! People are passing by. Shoulders back, and flip your hair a bit.

Okay. What was the room number again? Was it 215? Hope so. Well, that's the one here. Okay, here goes nothing. Open the door, stupid.

You’re inside the room. Find a seat.

Oh, there are seating arrangements? Should've known better, stupid.

This seat is yours? Oh, okay. In the back of the room.

That’s fine. Your stupid brain won't know the difference. Deal with it.

Pull out the iPhone. You don’t want people to think you’re a loser, or that you don’t have expensive things.

Pretend like the phone isn't dead, okay? Can your stupidity handle that?

Tap away.

Oh, the teacher is asking you a question. Better put the phone down and answer. Speak, say anything! And god, pull that skirt down!

Okay, the period is almost over. Maybe. You don’t know the schedule that much. Not yet. can't blame you for that, idiot. it IS your first day, after all.

Okay, take the phone out again. Tap with those nails. Make it loud, so people know you don’t want to talk to them.

Oh, the bell is ringing. Okay, get up and file out along with everyone else.

Don’t break formation. Don’t be stupid.

Breaking the rules will only result in exile.

Down the hallway. Pull out your schedule, but don’t make a scene of it. Everyone else has them, too. It’s not a weird thing to have a schedule if everyone has one.

Even though everyone has one, don’t draw attention to yourself. You’re not welcome here.

They don’t welcome you.

You don't even welcome yourself.

Oh, look at this. Stairs at the end of the hallway. Better pay more attention to your feet, now. Don’t fall! That will ensure your exile.

One foot at a time. Don’t trust those shoes.

Made it down the steps, finally. Good, good. Exile is not breathing down your neck anymore. It is waiting, instead, behind you. Its hands are out, ready to push you away from acceptance.

Push it away. for now. Tug your skirt down, and try to stop clopping. Your shoes radiate your stupidity.

Tap away with those nails, idiot.

What is your next class? Do you even know anymore? Look at the schedule, stupid.

Wait!

No!

Look up! LOOK!

...

What is that? A boy is staring at you. Why is he staring at you, stupid? Why you, out of all the people in this hallway?

What to do you do? What SHOULD you do? Just DO something, please!

Tap. That is all your stupid brain can handle. It’s always the tapping. That phone will break from the taps, soon enough.

You need to go to your next class. Look at that schedule, idiot. Take a good look at it. Forget that boy and look at the damn schedule.

You don’t like this school, it seems. Want to be back at the other school, where it was warmer, and you knew people?

Shame that you can’t go back.

Crying shame.

Go to your next class. Please, just go to the next class and shut up. Stop thinking about everything.

Only this period left of your first day. It's everyone's first of the year, but you're even newer than they are. Just... don't talk to the people. You do not want them to exile you so early in the school year.

Well, what if we tried to talk to them...? They may be nice.

No. Never. They will rip you apart.

But, I haven't even tried! I need to try in school, everyone knows that.

Not yet. Not now.

Remember that boy, though? He looked like he wanted to talk to me...

No, he didn't. No one wants to talk to you, stupid. People have told you that before, and you should listen.

No one wants to talk to you. go to your class, idiot. Don't try to talk to anyone. They don't want to talk to you.

Open the door, idiot.

Sit down, stupid.

Get that pencil out. You remembered your pencil, didn't you?

.....

Oh, of course you forgot it. Wouldn't expect anything else from you.

What now?

Well...

You can't talk to anyone. That leads to exile. You can't. They don't want to talk to you.

I think they may want to talk to me, though. See that boy over there? He was the one from outside, in the hallway.

No, of course not. Stupid, he wants your body. Not the stupidity that you contain on the inside.

....No.

What?

No.

Stupid, are you trying to form coherent sentences? Shut up. Your name is STUPID for a reason, stupid.

No, it is not. Stop calling me that.

But, I call you the truth, stupid.

I am not stupid.

Yes, you are. Just sit here, stupid, and-- Wait, what are you doing?

I'm going to ask him for a pencil.

Stupid. Sit. Down. You're heading straight to exile!

No, I am not. Shut up.

...

Are you done calling me stupid?

Fine. Fine, whatever. Do what you please. Just don't hate me later when he turns you away and you're exiled.

So, you'll shut up now?

No, I will not.

Fine. Watch me get a pencil.

 

"Can I borrow a pencil?"

 

...

Are you done calling me stupid?

You're not exiled. How...

I was never going to be exiled, you know. I'm surprised you never found that out.

...

Are you done?

...

Good. He's cute, too.

Absolutely not.

...

....

Watch me.

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Nannyn

March 2014

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